Tonight was one of those nights where I just wanted to curl up in bed, cover my head and forget the world. It’s funny because it was payday today and usually payday is a great day. The problem is, both my poor decisions as well as my terrible paydays mean that I’m absolutely broke for another 15 days. Sure, I received a paycheck but it all goes to rent. I used to have great credit and be really responsible with money and then – I don’t know what happened. Well, I do. I didn’t take responsibility for myself and I chose someone else over my bills and it put me in a world of mess that I don’t seem to be able to crawl out of. I don’t want to talk about poor me or pity me or anything.
On top of realizing I just got paid but I still don’t have any money, I thought I still had some money on a gift card that I didn’t realize I actually used on digital purchases. So, now where I thought I had some extra cash I didn’t. Better off anyway since I was buying cat food and wanted to find something for myself but couldn’t find something for myself.
It’s one of those days and all I think is, it’ll get better. Next month will be better because – and I tell myself reasons. Then something major happens or whatever and it’s back to nothing.
Broke. That’s a huge part of my story.