Tonight was one of those nights where I just wanted to curl up in bed, cover my head and forget the world.  It’s funny because it was payday today and usually payday is a great day.  The problem is, both my poor decisions as well as my terrible paydays mean that I’m absolutely broke for another 15 days.  Sure, I received a paycheck but it all goes to rent.  I used to have great credit and be really responsible with money and then – I don’t know what happened.   Well, I do.  I didn’t take responsibility for myself and I chose someone else over my bills and it put me in a world of mess that I don’t seem to be able to crawl out of.  I don’t want to talk about poor me or pity me or anything.

On top of realizing I just got paid but I still don’t have any money, I thought I still had some money on a gift card that I didn’t realize I actually used on digital purchases.   So, now where I thought I had some extra cash I didn’t.   Better off anyway since I was buying cat food and wanted to find something for myself but couldn’t find something for myself.

It’s one of those days and all I think is, it’ll get better.  Next month will be better because – and I tell myself reasons.  Then something major happens or whatever and it’s back to nothing.

Broke.  That’s a huge part of my story.